I’ve often wanted to be really, really super at something – extraordinary, even. I have thought it would be so cool to be able to sing like my friend, April – she’s really amazing; write a book that would capture the attention and inspire the masses; or be able to effortlessly paint or draw anything I wanted.
I’m good at a few things, but I’m not spectacular. I don’t meant that in a self-loathing, pity-party kind of way. It’s just the truth – and I’m okay with that.
This morning, I was reading through Acts 3 & 4, and I landed on 4:13 for some time.
“When they saw the courage of Peter and John, and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.” (NIV)
I’ve sort of marinated in that verse today. See, I know my sinful heart, and I’ll be honest. I think that if I was extraordinary at something, it would be extremely easy for me to take the credit all the time. I’m not proud of that, but it’s true. This verse reminds me that I can rejoice in my ordinary abilities because God can do extraordinary things with them. Also, there will be no doubt that it was accomplished through Him – not me.
In all I do, I want people to take note that I’ve been with Jesus.
I had something completely different to post today. However, as I was looking through my journal this morning, I came across an entry I had written three months ago. I had never intended it to be a blog post, but I really felt like God was telling me to put it out there this morning. And, after reading Francis Chan’s Forgotten God, I’ve decided not to ignore those promptings! I hope it benefits you in some way.
A few months ago, I was going through a season of discontent – or maybe unrest is a better term. It was almost imperceptible, but there nonetheless. One day I sat down, prayed, and started writing. I listed all the possible sources of what I was feeling, followed by answers I felt the Lord was giving me. I closed it out with what I could do as a result of what I learned.
I’m just going to write it here as it was in my journal. Please forgive the following sentence fragments and general rambling nature of this post. Just be thankful I re-typed it. Reading my handwriting might have been too much of a challenge!
January 27, 2011
What’s my problem?
1. Frustrated at myself for my weight gain?
2. Letting my selfish thinking overtake me? Homeschooling “prevents” me from pursuing my writing goals more aggressively.
3. Overwhelmed with all the stuff I seem to never accomplish?
Possibilities to ponder in response to these:
1. I am the only one to blame for eating too much. By the same token, I am the one who can change the pattern. Do it!
2. Did God call me to homeschool? YES! Focus on the eternal rewards. Who will remember that travel article about Puerto Rico you wrote five years ago? The girls will remember the time you spent with them, and their hearts will be changed because of how you showed them God on a daily basis. Make sure you show them God on a daily basis!
3. It’s just stuff! Focus on what truly matters and let the rest go!
I must stop:
procrastinating
comparing myself to others
I must start:
being more organized (home and school)
live in the moment more – appreciate those sweet girls and precious husband
Although I was a sobbing mess at the end of that journal writing time, I was lighter and empowered. I’m still working on showing the girls God on a daily basis – sometimes it’s quite the opposite, I’m afraid! I have answers to my questions, though. And whenever one of those lingering insecurities and doubts creep in, I can go straight to January 27th and be reminded of God’s truth in my life.
I’ve been doing Weight Watchers for about three weeks now. Out of the gate, I rocked it – losing four pounds in the first week. Since then, it’s been an uphill, or should I say “upscale” battle. I lost a tad bit the second week, and maintained the third week.
My most recent weigh in was particularly frustrating. After having stayed diligently within my points range all week, I managed to gain two pounds. *Dejected sigh*.
However, what happened following that discouraging reality check is what frustrates me the most – my reaction. I completely fell off dove head first off the Weight Watchers wagon. For two days I didn’t count anything, and made some particularly unhealthy food choices several times over.
Why doesn’t disappointment like that fuel me into positive action? It should motivate me to want to work harder and eat smarter, right?
Maybe owning up to my ridiculous response is the first step to making a change. Better go find where that wagon went and haul my fat butt back on it.
Yes, I realize I’m posting this on Sunday. The weekend got away from me, what can I say?
Anyhoo. I just wanted to share one of our family’s favorite salad recipes. We made it last night. Hence, the “Salad Saturday” title. I try to do a “salad dinner” every week. I’m not always consistent, but I try. It’s easy, healthy, and helps my kids think outside the box as far as dinner options go.
And this recipe – well, I’ll put it this way. When I tell my ten-year-old I’m making it, she squeals. Oh, and you don’t want to watch her at the dinner table that night. It’s like a mother lion over fresh prey. I’m not kidding.
Okay, enough small talk. Here’s the recipe. I think you’ll love it.
Mixed greens (or Romaine lettuce works well)
Fresh strawberries (sliced)
Mandarin oranges (canned, drained)
Candied pecans
Feta cheese
Grilled chicken (you can make it fresh, or Tyson grilled in the frozen food section is good)
Ken’s Light Raspberry Vinaigrette Dressing (you have to use this brand – it’s the best)
Mix all these things together and chow down. Seriously, you’ll be licking the bowl.
When I have extra Weight Watchers points to spare, I’ll go to Breadsmith and get some French Peasant or Sourdough bread to eat with it. That way you’ll have something to sop up the extra dressing with. (Did I really just use the word “sop”?)
Enjoy!
Still Life With Apples, Paul Cezanne
One day after a grocery store visit, a came home with such a large abundance of produce, it wouldn’t all fit in the refrigerator. The resourceful gal that I am decided to pile the apples and pears in a wicker basket and leave it on the counter top. Ah! Space-saving and aesthetically pleasing!
What I noticed over the next few days was interesting. The apples and pears disappeared at a much faster rate than normal. Hmm. I thought I might be on to something.
The next morning, I took the grapes out of the fridge and placed them on the counter for the day. The were gone by the end of the day.
The “out of sight, out of mind” adage certainly seems to hold true here. Now, most of our fruit has a prominent place front and center – and replenished often!
Lately, I’ve found myself filled with a burning desire to be more domestic. Okay, maybe more like a somewhat hot and smoking ember of a desire.
I spend minutes hours perusing blogs and web sites that inspire me to the point of distraction. The girls and I are already planning our vegetable and flower gardens; I’ve been slowly changing out store-bought cleaning products for ones I’ve made (from said blogs and web sites); and I just succeeded in my second attempt at baking my own bread. Sometimes I even have visions of our little family “living off the land” in some remote part of the country. There are even chickens and a cow in those visions (and a pig named Fluffy).
I’m not sure why this sudden urge to be all Ma Ingalls and stuff. Maybe I’m waxing nostalgia for a simpler time (yes, I see the hilarity in using the word “simpler” when talking about milking cows, raising chickens, and the back-breaking labor of garden tending). Maybe I’m finally embracing this whole stay-at-home mom thing with reckless abandon. Or, this could quite possibly be a phase that ends when I discover my tomato plants don’t remotely resemble the picture on the seed packet.
Whatever the outcome, I’m enjoying learning new things and stretching myself way beyond my comfort zone. It also seems like I’m showing the girls how to do things that might serve them well later in life. I’m certainly not ready to don a gingham frock and cook over open flames on a regular basis, but I may start wearing my aprons more often.
For years, my husband has complained about Valentine’s Day.
“Why do I have to buy flowers or candy just because it’s Valentine’s Day? I could get you flowers every day of the year, and just because I don’t do something on Valentine’s Day, I’m instantly a jerk.”
Some of you ladies may need to stop reading here. Because it’s like this.
I agree with him 100%. Why does he have to do something special just because it’s February 14th?
He shows he loves me by finishing the laundry I’ve let go.
He shows he loves me by putting air in the tire I’ve neglected for weeks (and I think he actually did that on Valentine weekend!).
He shows he loves me by bringing me my favorite biscuit sandwich (in a cooler!) from our favorite breakfast place during his last trip to our hometown.
He shows me he loves me by making the bed. Every. Morning.
And, yes, he shows me he loves me by telling me so several times a day – and meaning it.
I realize I may be in the minority of women with husbands who do these kinds of things. But I hope I’m not.
I also hope that if your husband is consistent in showing you his love often – even in small ways – that you take note. You might even want to send him flowers this year.
Once, when my youngest daughter was five, we purchased a large jar of pickles. Upon returning from the store, she immediately wanted one. After several failed attempts at opening the stubborn jar, I sighed and said: “We might have to wait for Daddy to get home and help with this thing!”
Within a minute, I heard a small voice echo from the living room.
“Dear Lord,” my daughter said. “Please help mama open the pickle jar. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Almost instantly, the jar lid opened with a loud POP! We could not believe it. To see the expression of shock and triumph on her little face was a blessing I recall in my mind often.
So many times in my life I have neglected to go to God about something because I felt it was too insignificant. Other people certainly have more important prayer concerns. Such a big God has better things to do, right?
“And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.” Ephesians 6:18a (NIV)
It seems my five-year-old has a better grasp of prayer than I do. What I need to remember is that, yes, He is God of the big things. He’s God of the little things, too – even pickle jars.
I was in a waiting room the other day, and picked up a complimentary copy of a woman’s magazine, Today’s Charlotte Woman. The cover seemed relevant enough – it showed a picture of a woman. What I found on the inside, however, perturbed me to a state of slight anger.
Page after page, I was inundated with ads touting celebrity white teeth, Botox injections, “quick” fat loss treatments, plastic surgery and other cosmetic “enhancements”. Ten such ads were in the first 14 pages. One ad showing an extremely airbrushed looking 50-something woman even read: “Confidence in my doctor…in my results…in me.”
Is this really today’s woman? I may be in the minority, but I refuse to believe that.
I believe that today’s woman sees the laugh lines and remembers those moments she earned them.
Today’s woman notices the stretch marks and quietly thanks God for the children who gave them to her.
Today’s woman runs or works out to stay strong and be healthy, not to achieve an unrealistic “Hollywood” image goal.
Today’s woman can be confident and secure in the fact that she is loved by and beautiful to the God Whom created her.
My prayer today: Lord, help me see myself as you see me – not as the world sees me. Remind me that You have created me an original, amazing, and strong woman, and that I am beautiful to You. Help me focus on the number of lives I can change today, instead of the number on the scale.
